sexual revolution at nautilus teachings

cheating on a spouse
is a sin,
a deep fissure is formed
between man and woman
of both couples…
if it ends a marriage
children and families
get torn apart suffering
tremendous hurt.
yet,
people still cheat.
i cannot tell you why they do
but i can confirm
something is broken
between them.
i do not endorse infidelity
by any means
but when the human heart
mind, body and soul
feel trapped
unable to catch
their breath
always hiding
secrets from them
when love is pushed to
the limits of take it and endure,
or leave it and loose everything
starting from rock bottom
with little or no furniture,
money
clothes
working a shit job just
to put food on the table
people tend to choose
suffering in silence
withdrawing
drugs, gambling, shopping
spreading themselves to thin…
according to the Journal of
Couple and Relationship Therapy,
approximately 50 percent of married women
and 60 percent of married men
will have an extramarital affair
at some time in their marriage.
And since it is unlikely
that the people having affairs
are married to each other
in every case,
the current statistics on the percentage
of married couples who cheat on each other
means that someone is having an affair
in nearly 80 percent of marriages.


now, let’s journey back
to sher.
men controlled her life
the abuse she suffered
as a child
confirmed
men were pukes,
but they were necessary
to provide for you.
this holds no water today,
but you must take your mindset
back to the 60’s, 70’s and 80’s.
inside of her, every definition of man
was a governing bully
who called all the signals
and dominated women…
the men held the purse strings
instructed them what
they could and could not do
all while silencing
the voices
of what they saw
as the duties of a good wife-
women obeyed…
sure women were great
for cooking, cleaning, sewing,
raising the children,
woman abandoned their dreams
let go of wanting
and were resigned to live
the life laid out by their
mothers, grandmothers
and every generation before them…
There was sexual liberation,
which had something to do
with women liberating themselves
in the bedroom, too,
but had as much to do with
loosening norms around sex.
In 1960, half of 19-year-old women
who were unmarried
had not yet had sex.
By the late 1980s,
as Nancy Cohen points out,
two-thirds of all women
had done the deed by age 18.
The year 1972 alone
saw the publication
of such groundbreaking books
as “The Joy of Sex” and “Open Marriage.”


today,
most parents I know
are happy to see their
young adult children
try on several partners
before they marry…
they do not want them
going what they went through
divorce(s)!
no one tells you when you bring home
this tiny bundle of joy
that in 15-25 years
this cute little
i want to kiss you all over
beauty you created
out of love
will look you in the eyes
and say,
“i hate you…”
nor can parents ever imagine
their adorable little
mini them’s
would step out of the box
they were raised and
not believe in God
get hooked on drugs
and in some cases
never call their parents again…
this
THIS
is why
sher obeyed
this
THIS
is why
she stayed…
the fear she lived in
controlled every aspect of her life
she was raised to believe
women cannot parent alone
women cannot make it alone
women need to shut up
and obey
she had no idea
each and every man
she loved,
which is twisted,
i know
every single one of them
she would one day
come to learn
they were fighting
inner demons,
battling low self worth,
were themselves,
being tormented…
girls were weaker
girls were targets
girls obeyed…
the entire sexual revolution
that was going on in the world
was not going on in sher’s house-
sure dory rebelled a little
by getting a job
working her way to the top
having her own credit cards
buying a car all by herself
not to mention
replacing her fathers
ugly table
with an antique…
and yes,
sher saw all of this
but she also came home
to her mother crying in the darkness
by the phone
or in her bedroom
after being verbally abused
by one of her sons
only to end the day
with hearing her father
tell her mother
she was a bad mom…
how do you process all this
when you go to choose
a life long partner,
do you obey?
or
do you begin living
a lie while portraying submission?
think about her thoughts.
how at such a young age,
her first love,
was a very good guy
yet she did as she was told
marrying their choice of man
fulfilling the dreams of
the mother she loved so much
who was her best friend
and wanted her daughter
to have everything she did not…
what would you do
if the man you really loved
showed up at your wedding?
take his hand?
have the affair?
how long would you, yourself
have remained imprisoned?
could you,
would you,
have walked away?
I can tell you at the very
moment she saw him
she was not thinking
WWJD,
her first thought
was oh, shit!